Knife Writer

The den of the thisisaknife team

Thursday, November 30, 2006

Doing It For The Kids

That sketch in this week's show. The title sequence took longer than the rest combined.

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Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Nice to See Hugh...

After we finally caught up with Hugh (you know, the guy who lives in a ditch), we managed to give him a bloody good interviewing. Results below.

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Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Please Hang Up

Our queue remix.

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I Am Dean Gaffney...

Here's a luvverly video that someone sent us and, although we don't normally do this sort of thing, here it is. It's Robbie from EastEnders (né Dean Gaffney) freaking out when he discovers he's got to take part in a Bush Tucker Trial almost as soon as he's entered the programme. And boy does he freak out.

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Friday, November 24, 2006

Getting Shirty

For those aspiring to be as fashionable as Donal, just a note that many, many of his T-Shirts come kindly provided by MoreTVicar. How'd you like that?

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Autumn of Sam

It's not too late! I've just come across an internet TV series of the same high calibre of Sunset Beach, although maybe even more exciting - as it's made clear that on the episode dated 15th December, the main character will die. Not even the actress playing her knows who dunnit. We're up to number 65 in the daily programme tally, but with episodes of this quality - who really cares about that anyway. Wait for the shocking revelation.

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Thursday, November 23, 2006


Remember Brian Atene, the guy who made this audition tape when he wanted a role in Stanley Kubrick's Full Metal Jacket? And remember this guy, who claimed he was Brian Atene and made a parody of said audition tape? Well, it turns out that Brian Atene hasn't let himself go nearly as much as the fat man in the second video would have us believe. For said fat man is lying. This is the real Brian Atene with some interesting insights into what made him make that tape.

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that was my knife

After a bit of a cleanup at headquarters, I've come across a few videos that were made during the old batch of thisisaknife but were never broadcast. As they weren't really anything to do with the show at all. I'm going to put them up here on the blog over the next few weeks leading up to the 5th December, which is completely astonishingly our year anniversary. The first is this: The thisisaknife Rap.

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Monday, November 20, 2006

Russia Hour

Another cracking little video from English Russia, which brought us that clip of the particularly violent talk show a while back. Anyway, this time it's the Moscow subway at peak hours and boy is it busy. Suddenly, the Northern Line don't look so bad at all. And if that's whetted your appetite for all things Tubular and Muscovite, here's a set of less-than-usual pictures taken on the very same Moscow subway.

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Friday, November 17, 2006

The Dog's Buddy

One can use this to protect the crown jewels. Or your testicles, if you are a man: But his voice is particularly high. Has the damage already been done?

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Thursday, November 16, 2006

Filthy Stunt

It took long enough to compile all those tapes of footage from Sunday's stunt, I'm telling you. But now it's been released onto the world, I can show you an extra little one we did for fun at the end. If you haven't watched the show yet, though, here's a compilation of the rest, first. Ooo it was fun: Now for that extra woman:

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Web Carry-On

As you are probably aware by now, we are great big fans of WebCameron. Our good friend Matthew Edmonds did not succeed in getting his foot in the door of today's Conservative Party Political Broadcast (but for the record he would like to point out that HE IS NOT A TORY, and submitted an entry 'just for the hell of it'). However, the below entry of ours somehow managed to wedge itself on to the website. Let's hope that David gets the poor man what he asked for. And before we forget...a competition! We'll send you a present if you can get the most ridiculous video that you have shot up on to WebCameron.

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Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Blumder Lightning

Here are Donal and Blum meeting for possibly the last time. They made up with one another, and then Donal danced on the desk, and Blum danced on the floor. They are back to being friends. Donal began the meeting with a question about the World's Biggest Blind Date that Blum had organised a while back. Maybe they will dance again without the music.

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Buster Criminal

Well here's a video of a drunk burglar outside, and then inside, a liquor shop in America. He succeeded with the breaking and entering, but the exiting was more of a problem. It reminded us of Buster Keaton, so we made our own version to thrill you. Good bye.

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The Webmaster's Revenge

Suppose you take a lovely picture of a wedding, and decide to use it on a website promoting your wedding photography business. Like this: Suppose you then discover that this picture is being used by other sites who can't be bothered to take their own. And, what's more, they're even linking to the image directly off your server so you're paying for them to be able to display the image. What do you do? You change the image that their sites point to to a picture of the ugliest dog in the world: So their sites end up looking like this: And this: Beautiful.

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Monday, November 13, 2006

Mc Donal Ds

Me, Brian, Mike and John often go to "Maccy D's" when we're feeling hungry. In the past, we've always walked the 6 miles to the Streatham Restaurant, but I passed my driving test last Saturday, so I told the lads that I would drive them there. On the way, we sang our "McDonald's Song". It's a ritual for us, really. Although on this occasion, I had to keep my eyes on the road, so it was sometimes hard for me to keep up with the boys! One of the main advantages of being such good friends is that you know exactly what each other eats at McDonald's. But it's not really that hard to remember. John's nickname is "Big Man" - so he's not going to want chicken nuggets, is he?! I ordered Fillet-o-fish, Mike tried Curry Sauce (for the first time), and then realised he should have stuck with Barbecue, John spilt a bit of cheese on his shirt, and Brian discovered an extra Fillet-o-fish in the bottom of the bag. Result! It felt great to fill our bellies, but we ate in silence. We were no longer boys, able to sit on plastic mushrooms without raised eyebrows in the main restaurant; we were men who had entered an adult "Drive-Thru" world, and even if Mike had wanted to, there was no chance that he could have ordered a Happy Meal. We drove off quieter than before, the fragment of cheese still clinging to John's pink shirt, and Brian manically knocking his head on the window. McDonald's had changed. "Or maybe it's we who have changed", Mike mumbled. Reluctantly, I was forced to agree with him.

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Stunt Over

Well, we all had a lovely time at yesterday's stunt. Someone even got a mug. No-one got arrested. We may well release stills soon, but for now you're getting NOTHING. Except the trailer for the new simpsons movie.

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Sunday, November 12, 2006

Political Football

On webcameron, David asked for 20 second snippets of how people wanted the NHS to change. You had to make it by today, but the best are going to be featured on his next party political broadcast! Excitedly, Matt Edmonds of Stare Assault fame had a go. This video is already featured on the webcameron website. We're in with a chance.

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Friday, November 10, 2006

Steamy Windows

More Windows geekery, I'm afraid, and this time it's all about sounds. Microsoft have overhauled the sounds for Windows Vista, and here's a quick comparison between Vista and XP sounds. In summary, they've got from 'rum-pum-pum-pum' to 'plinky-plonk'. How very modern.

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Thursday, November 09, 2006

When I'm Cleanin' Windows

Today, it is rumoured, marked the end of Windows Vista development - apparently, they've finally finished it. To mark the the end of the long, five year wait, here's a lovely parade of old Windows screenshots for you to fondly/angrily remember.

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Wednesday, November 08, 2006

The Second Blumming

Previously on Knife vs Blum: We went to a premiere of Blum's film, then put it on our podcast. He watched it and filmed himself watching it and then put it on his podcast. We then filmed Donal watching Blum's response to Donal talking about his film. Here's Blum's response to all that:

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Tuesday, November 07, 2006

In Russia, TV Fights With You

I've had my eye on English Russia for a while. It's a typical comedy foreigner site with much on it that we Western Europeans can peruse smugly whilst laughing at the ways of others. This video prompted me to post, however, because while it superficially resembles Jerry Springer et al, it just seems infinitely creepier, from the drop-kick that begins proceedings to the almost silent response from the audience, who just seem to watch it as if it were a play. Take a look.

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WebCameron seems to be nothing if not inclusive - they've just accepted 'Blind Dave' as part of their user contributed experience. Even if you've seen it before, it's worth checking out here because it's just slightly unsettling watching Donal on the official WebCameron site. It makes you wonder whether they even watch these things.

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Friday, November 03, 2006

Sutton My Farce

Just a note for those who are interested: this week's Wall Charts Song was sung by none other than Al Sutton, previous thisisaknife presenter. For the few who have forgotten him, why not visit the old knife archive and re-live the past. And also maybe start a petition to get him back on telly. He was good. Here's the song in its entirety. And here it is for the connoisseurs, without those annoying subtitles.

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Thursday, November 02, 2006

Changing Faces

So many people have now jumped onto the 'Take a Photo of Myself Every Day for n Years' bandwagon (see here and here for its most famous incarnations) that it has earned itself the honour of a parody. Here's one from Olde English Comedy: And, while this isn't exactly a parody, it's certainly interesting in its own right - watch a pregnant lady grow and grow until she pops out a baby (don't worry - they don't show that bit):

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Life is Change

But is that a good thing? ............1986...................................................2006.................

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Wall Tart

We all know Donal likes a good wall chart, so we thought he ought to have his own. Click on the image below to get a larger version. So feel free to print it out and hang it on your wall.

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Pocket Rocket

It's Bonfire Night coming up and the Rednecks are here to help. Or rather, not to help, because if you do what they suggest in this video then you are almost certainly breaking the law. Do not do it. But do enjoy them squirming round the legal niceties.

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